{"id":16079,"date":"2020-10-08T10:51:51","date_gmt":"2020-10-08T14:51:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.singlecare.com\/blog\/?p=16079"},"modified":"2020-10-08T10:51:51","modified_gmt":"2020-10-08T14:51:51","slug":"living-with-depression","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.singlecare.com\/blog\/living-with-depression\/","title":{"rendered":"What it&#8217;s like living with depression: A personal essay"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For most people, emotions are non-linear. Feelings of despair and sadness are normal, along with good feelings, like joy and peace of mind. Depression can turn that regular range of emotions into an unusual and long-lasting period of despair, wherein the happy moments are non-existent\u2014or few and far between. Here\u2019s my experience of living with depression.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What depression feels like<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">In my early adulthood, I started to feel withdrawn, down, unmotivated, and constantly sad. What initially seemed like an off-day turned into weeks of painful feelings that seemed they would never let up. It was difficult to enjoy life with other people my age. Depression made typical, everyday tasks\u2014like brushing my teeth\u2014seem monumental. It felt like an invisible chain, keeping me in bed.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">What I didn\u2019t know at the time was, my skin color could make my journey to treatment even more challenging. Living with depression can be harder for Black people, explains Lauren Harris, Psy.D., a licensed clinical psychologist based outside of Chicago, Illinois. \u201cBlack adults are more likely than adults of other races to report depressive symptoms&#8230; and\u2026 less likely to receive treatment,\u201d Harris says. This occurs for a variety of reasons, such as racism, stigma, and stereotypes that Black women in particular are strong and able to withstand pain more than other races.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><b>RELATED: <\/b><a href=\"https:\/\/www.singlecare.com\/blog\/minority-health-questions-to-ask-a-doctor-bipoc\/\"><b>9 questions to ask a doctor if you\u2019re Black, Indigenous, or a person of color<\/b><\/a><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Symptoms of depression<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">My depression sapped my energy and dulled my mood, but there are many different types of mood disorders\u2014and the symptoms are different for everyone. According to the <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.nimh.nih.gov\/health\/topics\/depression\/index.shtml\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">National Institute of Mental Health<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">, some common signs include the following, when they linger all day, for at least two weeks:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Persistent sad, anxious, or \u201cempty\u201d mood<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Feelings of hopelessness, or pessimism<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Irritability<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Loss of interest or pleasure in activities you normally enjoy<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Decreased energy or fatigue<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Moving or talking more slowly<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Feeling restless or having trouble sitting still<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Difficulty sleeping, early-morning awakening, or oversleeping<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Appetite and\/or weight changes (weight loss or weight gain)<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Thoughts of death or suicide, or suicide attempts<\/span><\/li>\n<li style=\"font-weight: 400;\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive problems without a clear physical cause and\/or that do not ease even with treatment<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">If you\u2019re experiencing these signs, talk to your healthcare provider about a depression assessment.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Treating my depression<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">My diagnosis took longer than expected due to the stigma of mental health issues and racism. A series of doctors dismissed my symptoms and even told me to be strong, that surely I had been through worse. My symptoms got worse and more severe, and I realized that I could not continue as if everything were normal. I finally saw a psychiatrist who took my concerns seriously and prescribed an antidepressant called <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.singlecare.com\/prescription\/fluoxetine-hcl\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">fluoxetine<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> (the generic of <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.singlecare.com\/prescription\/prozac\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Prozac<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">), alongside therapy with a psychologist. Initially, I was reluctant to start on antidepressants because of the stigma associated with it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I was pleasantly surprised when\u2014after around three weeks\u2014I started feeling results. My intense feeling of overwhelming sadness and hopelessness slowly started to lift and the fears I had about not feeling like myself dissipated. I had worried I would feel less like myself on fluoxetine, but instead for the first time, in a long time\u2014I felt more like myself and able to function throughout the day. Receiving treatment and building healthy coping mechanisms has allowed me to continue to function, even when a depressive episode hits.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Aside from cognitive behavioral therapy and medication, there are many natural remedies that can help alleviate symptoms of depression, according to Tiffany Bowden, Ph.D., diversity consultant, mental health professional. \u201cExercise and a healthy diet are particularly supportive,\u201d Bowden says. \u201cSelf-care regimen, caring for plants, aromatherapy, yoga, music, engaging with positive friends, hair care, caring for animals, and family time when families are in healthy balance are all great supports.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Simple and practical steps like these work for me. Learning to be more mindful and staying present in the moment (not freaking out about the future) has lessened many depressive feelings for me. Repetitive tasks, like hair care while listening to my favorite music, help me self-soothe and work through my feelings. Aromatherapy with certain herbal scents, like lavender, helps to calm me\u2014and doubles as a natural remedy for my <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.singlecare.com\/conditions\/anxiety-treatment-and-medications\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">anxiety<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> and <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.singlecare.com\/blog\/sleep-remedies-for-coronavirus-anxiety\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">insomnia<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. It is also helpful on the go. I carry dried lavender or lavender essential oil with me and inhale it or dab some on my wrist for an instant calming effect.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Living with depression<\/span><\/h2>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">A part of managing my depression is accepting it, as with any other illness. It is a lifelong healing journey that requires changes to my treatment plan, patience, and most importantly loving kindness to myself.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Learning to understand my feelings, stressors, and triggers has helped me to manage my symptoms. That self-awareness makes it possible to avoid the situations, environments, or people that start my spiral into a low mood\u2014and makes it easier to manage dips when they happen.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Overcoming and understanding depression can be daunting for anyone, but with a combination of therapy, medication, and homeopathic treatment, I\u2019m able to live a normal life.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For anyone out there living with depression, know this: It is not the end, and you\u2019re not alone. More than <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.singlecare.com\/blog\/news\/depression-statistics\/\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">17 million adults<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> in the United States have had at least one major depressive episode, and 25 million adults have been taking antidepressants for at least two years. With effective treatment tailored to your symptoms, depression can be managed like any other health condition.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">For more information on seeking help or treatment or depression support, visit the<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.nami.org\/learn-more\/mental-health-conditions\/depression\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> National Alliance on Mental Health<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> or call the<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.samhsa.gov\/find-help\/national-helpline\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> helpline at 1-800-662-HELP. You can also find a peer support group <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.dbsalliance.org\/support\/chapters-and-support-groups\/find-a-support-group\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">here<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">. If you or a loved one is experiencing suicidal thoughts or self-harm, call the<\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/suicidepreventionlifeline.org\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> National Suicide Prevention Lifeline<\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> at 1-800-273-8255 or visit the nearest emergency room.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>For most people, emotions are non-linear. Feelings of despair and sadness are normal, along with good feelings, like joy and peace of mind. Depression can turn that regular range of emotions into an unusual and long-lasting period of despair, wherein the happy moments are non-existent\u2014or few and far between. Here\u2019s my experience of living with [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":85,"featured_media":15738,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[8318],"tags":[451,450],"coauthors":[20012],"class_list":["post-16079","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-community","tag-depression","tag-mental-health","wpautop"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.4 (Yoast SEO v27.4) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Living with depression: My journey to diagnosis and treatment<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"For anyone out there living with depression, know this: It is not the end. 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